Let’s recap the first 6 months of the year

Well, there have been some big things that have occurred in my life. For starters, I lost about 21lbs. After a doctor visit back in March, I was told that my cholesterol levels and weight were pretty unhealthy. My kids, especially my eldest, Alyssa had been on me about taking care of myself. Quite honestly, I had really let myself go over the years. Using food to comfort my emotional pain. It took about a month of me cutting back to drop the weight.

One of the things I started doing was going to things on my own. I figured it’s a great way to meet new people and experience new things. One of the best events I attended was midget wrestling. Oh man, that was soooooo entertaining! I loved every minute of it! Plus I had gone to a few motorcycle meetups. One thing I did learn is that in terms of motorcycles, I like to do my own thing. I wasn’t a big fan of the meetups because all people did were talk about their bikes and etc. I guess that’s cool and all, but I’d rather sit down for a pint with a good friend and talk about meaningful things.

My new romper, I loved it so much that I bought another!

I also started going to therapy to help deal with myself. I also reached out to the ex telling her that I want to just get along. Aleah had her HS graduation, plus we were hosting a party for her in which the ex was invited to. I made sure I was cordial and friendly.

In mid-June, Aleah had scoliosis surgery. She was in the hospital for several days, and about 3 weeks into it she fainted in the shower. Luckily Alyssa found her and was able to call 911. After several hours at the ER and a bunch of tests, we finally got home around 11:30pm. The doctors basically said it was a combination of things that lead up to it that are related to her surgery. Aleah is mending slowly, she’s still having a hard time with the pain levels and her heart rate spiking at times. Her sisters have been amazing in making sure she’s taken care of. As tough as this has been for Aleah, it really did put a lot of pressure on me and the girls. The ER trip was scary, plus we’re staying with her up until her surgeon gives her the clearance to be more independent.

It’s been about 3 years when it all hit the fan. For the most part, I’m doing well. Our home has become our home. The girls have taken more responsibility by adding their own decorative touches, cleaning and even having events there. It’s really been a blessing to have all the girls live with me. Between them and the dogs, it’s never a dull moment.

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Enjoying the moment(s)

One of the things I’ve learned to do while being single is to enjoy the moment, soak it all up…alone. Trust me it wasn’t easy at first because I was so used to being with someone all the time. Now that I’m single, I had to rediscover all the wants and likes in my life.

One of my favorite things to do is to go fishing. I go to a nearby park to fish, smoke a cigar, have the occasional meal, pray and hang out with friends. I make sure I take the time to breathe deeply, enjoy my surroundings and thank God through prayer for the things I see and feel. I don’t need to catch anything to make it great, if I do, then it’s like a bonus.

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In the past 3 years, I’ve taken small road trips to visit my brother in Yuma. The drive takes about 5-6 hours and I have learned to enjoy the time that goes by. During my drive I listen to great music, call someone and talk with them and pray. I’ll usually stop at an Indian Casino for a Prime Rib dinner too.

For me enjoying the moment(s) that life gives me helps to bring me back down to earth and remind me of all the things that God has done in my life. I can’t fully say that I’m completely healed from all the stuff that went down, but having my times alone to recharge has definitely helped. I think if anything, the best part about enjoying my new life is that I’ve been able to rediscover who I am and I really like the person I’ve become. I’m sure that enjoying the moment is a form of gratitude. I practice reminding myself of the things I’m grateful for all the time. It helps to defeat the negative thinking that can ensue when something triggers me.

Anyhow, the lesson for today is to enjoy the moment. Soak up the scenery and be grateful. Life is pretty good!

Would I call it a ‘Come Back?”

Right when I started going through some life changes, I abandoned many of my hobbies and interests. I picked up new ones, but I knew the things I used to do were still holding a special place in my heart. For me that was mountain biking and writing. I used to manage two sites, BikeCommuters.com and MtnBikeRiders.com. But while I was dealing with all the drama in my life, I decided to step down and relinquish my responsibilities to some dear friends. Now that I’m going into my 3rd year of my new life, I started showing more interest in these hobbies. In fact, I even bought a new mountain bike and I’ve started blogging again.
mtnbikeriders.com fat tire bike
This bike isn’t anything fancy, it’s a basic single speed fat tire mountain bike. I got a crazy deal on it through eBay. I’m actually looking forward to riding again, it should be fun. This fat bike would make things more interesting on the trail once I start riding again.

The blogging thing was actually huge. I used to pride myself on my ability to write about anything. But I stopped for quite some time just to deal with things. As of late, I’ve been publishing more and more work. One of my other blogs I run just got a new article posted and it’s about Chinese Scooters.

I think as I work through my stuff, I’m finally starting to get a sense of where I want to go and what I want to do. Writing and riding was always a big part of my life that I found very rewarding. So it only makes sense for me to come back to it. Just recently a friend was visiting whom I haven’t seen in years asked me how I’m doing and what I’m up to now. I told him that for the most part I’m doing well. He asked me about my hobbies, I told him I’ve been fishing more than I ever have but mentioned my new bike. I guess it was at that point where I started seeing that I’m on my way out of the muck and mire I’ve had to deal with in the past few years. Now that things are starting to settle down, I’m picking up where I left off. I’m hoping that the next thing I start focusing on would be my health. I do miss racing…but that’s for another day to talk about.

So how are things?

Thanks for asking. I’d say they’re getting better. Divorce sucks and I’m still dealing with some of the emotional trauma from it. But I have to say I’m doing better today than I was when it first hit the fan. My girls continue to do well. They still live with me.

A lot has happened over the past several months. So for starters I left a job in May to go work somewhere else. That new gig didn’t mesh well with my life and priorities, so I left. I landed with a Marketing Agency in South Orange County. I’m pretty happy here.

We lost Cowboy over the summer. He had some heart problems and was deteriorating so we had to put him down. It really broke all of our hearts. I still miss that guy. He was such a great dog.

cowboy

In his absense the girls really missed having another dog in the house. Sadie, our other doggo felt it too. So the girls went to the shelter and adopted a little girl named Maggie. She’s a cute and funny looking dog. Her personality totally reminds me of Alyssa when she was little. She’s basically Alyssa’s kid. Maggie is such a trouble maker…just like how her mom (Alyssa) used to be. Sadie tolerates her, it’s been a rough go around with those two, they fight on occassion.

maggie

Anyhow, this month I turn 42…dang I feel old! I’ve got more grey hairs on my head. Luckily I’m not going bald…thank goodness for good genes! Rather than having another party, I told the girls I just want something low-key at the house. I requested Costco Pizza, some beer and a few cigars to enjoy afterwards. I’m not sure why I’m not much in a partying mood.

Perhaps its just me getting older and not needing people to validate me. Parties are great for that, you invite your closest friends and family and they give you presents, hang out, joke with you about how old you’re getting and etc. It’s fun, but it also costs money. This year I know who I am, I’m loved, confident and I’m talented; which means I don’t need other people to remind me that. Don’t get me wrong, a happy birthday wish would be nice and would go a long way with me.

One of the things I told myself I wanted to pursue was to live a simple life. My previous life was very much about what someone else wanted. I’m not much into travel, I like good food, sometimes crappy Chinese food is the best. I also like just sitting around and just hanging out.

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With that in mind, I find myself going fishing quite often. I dont’ have to catch anything, if I do, then it’s a bonus. I go to the lake to decompress, relax, pray and journal. I love smoking cigars and riding my motorcycles. Ya that’s really about it. Those are the things I enjoy. I feel that I’m doing a great job in keeping up with it, lol.

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In the last-almost-3years, I’ve gotten more into working with my hands. I find it very theraputic. Working on my cars, motorcycles and just plain tinkering gets my mind to focus and remind me that I’m good at many of these things I get involved with. It’s funny, when I haven’t worked on stuff, I find myself wanting to hold tools in my hands just to get some sort of fix…no pun intended.

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Anyway, that’s it for now. There’s been quite a few things that has happened and currently going on now in my life. I’m on Instagram so if you feel inclined to, follow me @rlpolicar

Facebook memories

As you know Facebook Memories will pop up on your feed reminding you of all the cool stuff you did and how much skinnier you once were. Sometimes some of those memories are fun to look at and we can reshare it and say stuff like “oh wow, 7 years ago!” So just recently I saw some memories of when I used to race mountain bikes. Back then I was in great shape and I was competitive, now I’m older, fatter and broker. The days of racing are exactly what Facebook shows, memories.

But it got me thinking…what if I start racing again? My kids are older so I don’t have to worry about baby sitting, plus I don’t have a nagging wife asking when I’ll be back from the races. I can actually put the time in to training if I really wanted. Heck just last night I was out riding with my friend Moe and I got this idea of racing again. It’s going to take some major work for me to get up to a level of fitness where I can actually survive a race and not die in the middle of it.

After our ride we got on the phone with my other friend Art who is working on a deal for me. He’s working out a major discount for a new mountain bike. This new bike will cost me an arm and leg, but I figure I’ll invest into myself. While we were on the phone I told Art and Moe that once I get my new bike, that we all should do an Enduro race just for giggles. I told them it will be just like 2010! We all laughed because that year was the peak of our racing careers. We were sponsored by a number of companies, we had matching bikes, jerseys and other gear. Heck, we even had stickers! Now you know you’re legit when you have stickers!

Now that we’ve got this idea planted in our minds, I’m actually looking forward to just getting back to all that racing and riding jazz. Who would have thought that Facebook memories motivated me to get back in to something I really did love.

Why hobbies are good for you

From late 2016 through most of 2017 I amped up some of my hobbies. I went all in on my hobbies of flipping motorcycles. I can’t recall, but I think I’ve bought and sold at least 15 motorcycles in that year alone. Then I took up building things. Nothing crazy, but I’ve built stuff out of old pallets, surplus Army ammo cans and even more recently I started building up this wrecked scooter I bought to have a Mad Max look.

I’m not going to bore you with scientific details on why hobbies are good for you. But I’ll just share how it’s benefited my life. For starters I love working with my hands. To me it’s very therapeutic because it helps me feel competent. Yep, it makes me feel smart and that I am able to do something.

Doing something that helped me feel smart and capable allows me to find confidence. Even if I’m not good at what I’m working on, I’ve learned that the more I do these things, the better I become at them. I’ll give you an example. I got into building Bluetooth speaker systems out of US Army surplus ammo cans. These cans have been sitting in the desert for years not being used for anything. So I got a handful of them and started to work. When I first got into it, I had basic tools. My first ammo can was…OK, not great but just OK. The second one was much better. The third ammo can was even nicer than the one previous to it. I had added some new features to it that made me really proud. On my fourth can, I made it smaller, but it had all the options of the previous model. Since I’ve built a few of these, I’ve learned what works and what doesn’t. In fact, after I built the 4th one, I knew that the 5th model will be even better. Now I know exactly what I’ll need to do to perfect the build.

Anyhow, working with my hands doesn’t stop with these ammo cans. Not too long ago my daughter and I took on a repair on her car that I’ve never done before. So we bought some tools and the parts needed and replaced the CV axle on her car. It was a great experience and my kid was able to be part of it too.

I’m sure the things I’ve mentioned aren’t as fancy as some of the real life Ron Swansons out there. But to me, they’re huge. They’re significant because during the times that I felt the worst about myself, my hobbies helped me feel good that I could create/fix and make things better.

A lot has happened…

Hello,

If you’re one of the 3 people who actually visit this site, thanks for coming by! But I also wanted to give an update on what’s been going on with me. First let’s start of that this blog will now become my own personal journal. I’m gainfully employed doing Online Marketing for a reputable company, so I don’t need to post my thoughts about that stuff here since I’m actually practicing what I’ve preached.

OK so let’s get going…Well, where do I start, oh ya, I got divorced. All my kids live with me, we are doing well. Our home is messy, our dogs bark a lot and we drink too much coffee. We laugh at fart jokes, stuff about periods and me dating again. It’s never a dull moment in my home.

Another big thing that has happened is actually grew my hair out! Ya I know for some people that’s not a big deal. But I had kept it short for over 15 years. As soon as I got separated I let it grow. Yes I actually have a full head of hair, I’m not bald or going bald. But I do have a spot on my scalp where its bare. That’s because when I was a kid, some kid threw a large rock and it hit my head, which scarred over.

Within the 2016-2017 I took the time to really discover myself. I got more into motorcycles, whiskey and cigars. I also got into building stuff with my hands. I find that working with my hands is somewhat therapeutic. It helps me feel competent and that I have some sort of manly skill that I can offer. I mean it’s like a primitive desire that men have that they are able to offer something to a potential mate. Just picture a cave man trying to impress a cave woman…he wants to show off his skills to woo the ladies right? I suppose working on cars, motorcycles and building stuff is kinda like my way of peacocking to potential mates…lol

Anyhow during this time period I was able to do some really cool stuff like sky dive with my brother and daughter, get a tattoo, buy and sell a bunch of motorcycles and be part of a Yamaha Motorcycles commercial! How cool is that eh?

All that stuff is great and all, but there were some tough times. Getting divorced messes a person up. Plus having to be there for your own kids during this time is another tough situation to deal with. But Lord willing, things are working out.

Rather than me boring you with details, you might want to just check out my Instagram and get a pictorial view of what life has been like for me.

Until next time!

RL Policar

Why are memes essential in your social media?

For a few of my clients I create memes to help best connect with their target audience. But before we get into all that, let’s first understand what a meme is.

meme
mēm/Submit
noun
an element of a culture or system of behavior that may be considered to be passed from one individual to another by nongenetic means, especially imitation.
a humorous image, video, piece of text, etc. that is copied (often with slight variations) and spread rapidly by Internet users.

Now that we know what it is, I’m sure you’ve seen them floating around on your feed. So why would you need it for your business? Well the reasoning is quite simple, you help connect to your customers in a humanistic level. This allows your brand to reach almost all of your target through humor. Not only does it engage your customers, but they can identify with your meme, thus them sharing it on with their friends and etc. What’s great about that is when they share it it automatically links back to your fanpage. So now you’ve enabled your customers to reach other people who didn’t know about your brand.

The hope is those new people will LIKE your page and then they’ll be exposed to all the deals and initiatives you’ve got going for your brand. But can you overdo memes? Absolutely! Posting more than 3 memes a week can turn your customers off. Plus it might give them the impression that you’re not all that professional.

Memes are great when they are used in conjunction with a campaign. So let’s say you’re selling a new product. Publish your product on the fanpage to let people know that you’ve got a deal going on, then later on, publish a meme. So now you’re getting people onto your fanpage and seeing your meme as well as the new product. handsome player

You think you have what it takes to do what I do?

I’ve seen this happen more than a few times where I meet with a company and pitch my services for Social Media Management only to find out that they decided to manage their own efforts. But here’s the thing that they don’t understand. Social Media is time consuming. Some people seem to think that its just posting on Facebook and Twitter…eh..partially true. But there’s more to it than they realize. There’s actual planning, research, knowing your target audience, knowing the times to post content, knowing what kind of content to post and knowing what makes your customers tick.

With my services, I’ve discovered what works and what doesn’t work with Social Media. Just because you have a Facebook account, it doesn’t mean you can do what I can do. But it’s the same thing if you look at car mechanics. I’ve got a car and tools, but it doesn’t mean I can do their job. Nor could I ever be a Barrista just because I have a coffee maker. So I hope you understand that there’s more to Social Media than most people think. Let a professional handle your online presence so you can focus on doing what you’re great at, that’s running your business. 

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